In the current recruiting and hiring environment, it isn't enough anymore to just "care" about the numbers. You have to care about your people, first. How do we teach leaders to care? It begins with something that seems so simple and something everyone initially thinks they do well.
在当前的招聘环境中，仅仅“关心”数字是不够的，雇主必须先关心员工。我们如何教导领导者关心他人？我们可以从一些看似简单的小事或自认为应该做好的事入手。Listening. Listening to understand and validate, not to judge and argue. This is the greatest of all leadership skills in our business, home and communities. I think it's pretty well accepted and said fairly often that better listening skills could solve a lot of problems in our society.聆听——倾听是为了理解和检验，而不是评判和争论。聆听是公司、家庭和社区中最伟大的一项领导技能。在我看来，大多数人认为社会中的许多问题可以通过提升聆听技能得到解决。But if listening is so simple -- across the board in our country and in our world -- why do all the interpersonal problems we have in business and our daily lives still exist? Why aren't we able to do a better job? Because we listen in order to respond. Because we fail to listen to understand. Because we are not listening empathetically.但聆听真的如此简单吗？那为何我们仍会在职场生活和日常生活中遇到各种人际问题呢？为什么我们不能做得更好？因为我们是为了回答而去倾听，因为我们听不懂，因为我们无法感同身受。
True empathetic listening -- where one actually hears the other person's words and feelings -- is the kind of listening that builds empathy as it allows us to see things from others' perspectives. It's the key to all meaningful relationships as it shows that you respect and care for the person you're hearing. If you want to be a caring leader, you have to really understand the proper way to listen. The way we actualize caring is through empathetic listening.真正有同理心倾听是听懂对方的话，与对方感同身受，这是一种建立在同理心之上的倾听，它可以让我们从别人的角度看待事情。同理心倾听是一段有意义的关系的关键所在，它表明了你对说话者的尊重和关心。如果一个人想成为一个有爱心的领导者，那么他必须真正理解什么是正确的倾听。我们可以通过聆听来传递关爱。What kind of listener are you? Are you really listening to the people you lead? To the people in your life? How can you do better? Consciously thinking about and utilizing these five listening skills can help you be a more empathetic and caring leader and person:你是什么样的倾听者？你真的在听下属说话吗？真的在听生活中他人讲话吗？怎么能做得更好？有意识地思考和利用这五种倾听技巧可以帮助你成为一个更有同理心和爱心的领导者和人：
◼️集中注意 ｜Attending BehaviorFocus your presence on the other person. Behave toward the other person in such a way that they know they have your undivided attention, absent of distraction. Put away your phone. Make eye contact. Have an open body posture. Lean forward. Nod along as they speak. But most importantly, give them your full attention and be present outwardly and within.把注意力集中在说话者的身上，你要通过你的行为让说话者知道你正全神贯注地聆听，并未分心。注意把手机收好，进行眼神交流。保持放松的身体姿势，注意身体前倾。在讲话者说话时注意适时点头，最重要的是，聆听需要全身心投入。The verbal and nonverbal messages we give to the other person are very important. We want to prove to them that we are paying attention and tuned in to what they are expressing. We are acknowledging what they are saying. Verbal acknowledgements include phrases such as: "Uh-huh. "Really..." "No kidding." "Yes, I see." "That's interesting."我们给对方的言语和非言语信息是非常重要的。我们想向他们证明，我们正在关注并聆听他们所表达的内容。我们承认他们的话。我们可以这样说：“嗯。”真的。”“不开玩笑。”“是的，我明白了。”“这很有趣。"
While listening to the other person share, it may make sense to offer a statement or two that encourages the other to continue to talk or share. Such encouragements to continue to carry-on are called door openers. Some examples to invite more conversation are "Go on ..." and "Tell me more ..."在听对方分享的同时，提供一两句鼓励对方继续交谈或分享的话可能是有意义的。这种鼓励继续下去的行为被称为“抛砖引玉”。我们可以说：“继续…”和“告诉我更多…”This skill is perhaps the most difficult to master. Silence is about being quiet -- saying nothing and quieting the chatter in our own minds so we can catch all the other is expressing. Clear your mind, try not to think of the next thing to say. Just absorb what the other person is saying.学会安静可能是最难掌握的技能。学会安静就是保持沉默，一言不发，让自己的头脑风暴安静下来，这样我们就可以全面捕捉到别人表达的一切信息。理清思路，尽量不去想接下来要说的话，吸收对方的话就行了。
◼️学会反馈｜Reflective ResponseThis is the only proof the other person has that we were truly listening. Prove to the talker that you understand. You can do this by saying something like "What I hear you saying is ..." and then repeat the essence of the talker's message.给予讲话者反馈可以证明我们在认真倾听。向谈话者证明你理解。你可以这样做，比如说“我听到你说的是……”，然后重复他的谈话要点。How can you be a caring leader? Listen. Slow down. Take a minute to clear your mind. Ready yourself to truly hear another's words. Really, truly listen. It's not as easy as it sounds, but it's worth every bit of the effort.怎么才能成为一个体贴入微的领导者？学会放缓脚步，花点时间理清思路。准备好让自己投入别人的话，做到真正的听。这可能听起来容易做起来难，但为此付出的努力都是有价值的。
- validate：批准，确认……有效；证实，确认；
- empathetical：移情的；有同感的，产生共鸣的
- undivided：专心的；专一的；未分开的；完整的
- interpersonal problems：人际问题
翻译：Gleen
材料来源：International Business Times
